Saturday, August 4, 2012

Back by popular demand...

you liked that title didn't you. Made you feel like you were about to read a really good bloggers blog post. Well I would like to say that its true.. I had dozens of people begging for another post but I would be lying to you. Truth be known you get a whole lot less popular when your married (not to say I was ever a beacon of popularity but you understand) (and did that even make sense? even if it didn't, it sounded good). I just feel like you slip right under the radar when your married. To give you a perfect example: I haven't texted anyone besides my husband (who is ridiculously good looking might i add) in a few months now and I think I'm ok with it! In fact, i quite prefer it! I hate texting on my US phone so even Will (the handsome devil) is lucky if he gets a reply!

So about an hour ago I was down frolicking in the pool, you know-showing off my swimmer skills, wearing the most revealing suit i could find, flaunting my body, whipping my wet hair around all sexy-like. (I hope i just gave you the best visual you've had all week... if you took any of that seriously then i am BEYOND offended). Anyways, now I'm back in my nicely air conditioned apartment. I had high hopes for today. In fact as I rode the elevator up to my floor i was thinking of all of the things i would accomplish before Will finished work. I was going to wash the towels so that we could shower for church tomorrow. Sunday is shower day around here. I also was going to do the dishes... and consider making my bed but I didn't want to overdue it or get myself too overwhelmed with my work load so that one was optional. Well, one thing led to another and I started watching Netflix (oh shocking). Clicked on the first thing i saw which happened to be "Auschwitz: Inside the Nazi State" and well.. That obviously wasn't entertaining enough so I thought I'd go a head and blog again. As it turns out blogging is actually hard. The first one wasn't too bad, just had to introduce myself but now what? My life isn't interesting. I don't even have funny children to tell rave about. So I'm at a loss. But I will tell you this: I have been going and knocking doors with that good husband of mine (what a PHENOMINAL wife I am right???) and boy oh boy have I been enjoying it!!!! Let me just give you a break down of the day. Well,  when we get to his area that he is supposed to knock for the day it becomes all to real for me, its really time to get out and go door to door? am i ready for that? heck no!  So naturally, i pretend i have a bunch of phone calls to make "Oh, my mom called and I told her i would call her back, don't worry it won't take long. I will just catch up to you". ...... two hours pass..... Im still sitting in the honda. Whip out my note book, plan out how I want to build our porch for the 478th time. Pretend like i have to pee so I can run to seven eleven quick, come back with a decently sized fountain beverage... By this time its usually about seven and I will ever so kindly say "Want me to come knock a few with you hunny?" Everyone tells me how cute it is that I go out and work with will everyday... Little do they know!

Well... I think i've about hit my blogging quota for today. Gotta go get myself looking fancy, we're going to the mallski! Gonna see if I can't buy a few more things-pack that honda right up for the 56 hour drive home! Don't mind if I do!! If you want the real truth of it all, I have to hide my purchases from The husband to save myself the lecture of how the devil are we gonna get it home. Needless to say i don't think of the most original hiding places and most of my items have been found and i usually end up getting even worse lectures. The other day he came down stairs and said "anything you need to tell me?".. I racked my brain for a good half hour then i came up to our apartment and there sat three of my hidden purchases. Obviously he needed to find something in the dirty laundry basket - whoops! Oh, you were wondering when i got this dress will? "This ol' thing? i've had it for years, come on, you've seen me wear this plenty of times" He's all to familiar with that one.

Oh and did you think that I would do a post without pictures? You couldn't be so lucky!!!

 And here we are, couple of the year looking happy as ever to be alive! This is old but classy none the less. (we never take pictures anymore... could have something to do with the bad hair we are both rocking, or zit infestations. Bad combination )

Yours truly

Monday, July 30, 2012

Fine. I'll make a blog. You've convinced me.

I've decided to make all of your dreams come true and start a blog. I know you've been waiting for it. You might have been thinking that the blog world is dying off.. well not anymore! There's a new cat in town! You might wonder what inspired me to make a blog? was it that I think my life is worth sharing? or was it that i've been wanting to for years? nope. neither of those. Truth is, when will left for work this morning I had full intentions of watching netflix for the majority of the day-sure my apartment is a mess and the same load of laundry has been in the washer for days but thats all irrelevant. Anyways, we have been watching a new series-well, we started it this morning and he always hates when I go ahead and watch them while he is a work so he has to skip a bunch cause I won't let him watch TV alone so he told me I wasn't allowed to watch it today. So i thought well, what the devil else am I going to do when it came to me. Your married. Married people have blogs. So here I am.... bloggity blogging away. I had high hopes for this blog too.. It was going to be cuter than everyone else's. That was until I tried to learn how to make it cute and realized that its actually hard. Too 
hard. So an ugly blog it is!!
Lets get right down to the nitty gritty shall we? The main event. The life of Alissa and Will Jardine.
What have we been doing for the last 3 months? Did we drop off the face of the earth? How many kids do we have now? are we still as good looking as ever? These are all commonly asked questions. Let me answer them for you.
Well, for the past three months we have been living in Butt Sauce Virginia. Its wonderful here; we live in a seniors apartment complex, we don't know anyone really out here so there's no one to impress therefor showering is optional, its five thousand degrees outside at all times so we always smell really good, our flusher on our toilet is currently broken so thats a dream, PLUS we have a pool at our building. Whats not to love?
We ventured out here at the end of april ( and when i say ventured I mean drove-for five hundred hours) and will "venture" home at the end of august, with a quick stop in St. George to see the Arringtons of course. Why are we here? To sell pest control, why else? I know what your thinking. Alissa would be SO good at selling pest control. classic mixup. I tried it (and i use the word tried loosely) I did it for a few weeks and I promise you that having all of your fingers sawed off by a dull knife would be better! It was the worst 2 week experience in my life. Lucky for me I happen to have a good husband who let me quit! Now Im living the life of leisure-stay at home housewife. I could pretend like I hate it and am going crazy but the truth is Im not. I rather enjoy it actually! Moving right along...
How many kids have we popped out?.... I can't believe you would ask that! The answer is none and its a sensitive subject so lets carry on.
Did we drop off the face of the earth? well like i said. We live in Butt Sauce Virginia but don't worry Raymond-We will be back in full force on the 31st of august.
Are we still as good looking as ever? Well.. marriage has been good to us to say the least! You know how people say you gain the "freshman 15" when you go to college? Well, that may or may not have been the case for me but is there any sayings for when you get married? Newley wed 75? We may be victim of that as well.
Well I think I'm about blogged out for today and this may be the one and only blog post you ever get out of me so enjoy this crap while it lasts.
Yours truly

Oh and here are a couple pictures of us at chistmas for your viewing pleasure! After all, whats a blog post without pictures!
Pure Joy on these faces. 

Shout out to Dianne for the killer puppy print PJ's.